Thursday, 8 August 2013

Infinity #1 Feedback

Infinity Mondays
Feedback – Infinity #1

Hello everyone The Copycat Kid here, Infinity founder and current COO. I welcome you all to the first edition of my Copy Room; the first installment discusses the feedback from the first Infinity Wrestling Federation show that happened August 5th 2013 and there is no better person to do it than the King of Character himself. I will even announce my first promo of the week once I am done with analysing the matches.

My congratulations to all the winners and condolences to those who were unfortunate in their first endeavor but do not feel disheartened this is only the start of your journey. By now most or all of you have asked about the feedback, and I am happy to say there will be feedback from every show. Not wasting any more time let’s get down to some serious business with this week’s show.

For the purposes of this segment I will be breaking my kayfabe gimmick, this feedback is directly concerned with character promos/scripts/role-plays the roster had submitted for their matches and how the show writers (and consequential) judges came to decide on the winners of the matches. But before I get into each match, I will refresh you with the promo criteria that I had written for the Promo Guide in the Developmental page of the Infinity website. I use this as a reference point to consider when I am judging promos, some points are more important than others but a well-rounded promo has all or most of these things.

Good Promos:
·         Grabs the reader’s attention and imagination
·         Direct, relevant to the match you are in
·         Written well, with good grammar and fitting writing style for your character
·         Interesting to read, original, innovative
·         Adds a new piece of story that improves Infinity City
·         Shows your knowledge of the Infinity City, whilst also interlinking with its living story
·         Complements your character/gimmick, and puts them over
·         Keeps to your alignment (Heel/Face/Tweener etc.)
·         Dialogue used well
·         Balanced in regards to length of promo

Bad Promos:
·         Copied or heavily plagiarised (cheaters will face consequences)
·         Indirect, not relevant to the match you are in
·         Poor use of grammar and chosen writing style for your character
·         Boring and unoriginal
·         Adds little or degrades the story of the Infinity City
·         Shows poor knowledge of the Infinity City, nor does it link to the living story
·         Contradicts your character/gimmick, doesn't put them over
·         Does not keep to your alignment (Heel/Face/Tweener etc.)
·         Dialogue badly used, large unbroken chucks of solid text
·         Unbalanced in regards to the length of the promo

You can check out the Infinity Developmental page here where you can learn how to build amazing promos, characters, and more! http://www.infinitywrestling.net/#!infinitydevelopmental/c1a4e

There are some other things that I also take into consideration when reading a promo, and that is after the reading the promo I ask myself what I can remember of the promo.

Promo Length
There have been issues with the submitted promos when management were judging them that I thought I’d bring up, and in many cases has hindered people’s chances of winning their respective matches. Many people did introductory short promos, I won’t namedrop but one thing I mentioned in my Promo Guide was that in order for a promo to be short enough it needed to be relevant, interesting, and possessing many of the good criteria stated above. Anything short of that and it was just a waste of time as there will be most likely no chance of a match being won.

Finding balance between what is long or short enough or what defines quality is what I mean by promo length. Make your promos as long as they need to be, just don’t deliberately underplay yourself with a super short promo that has no chance of winning and which doesn’t include barely any content to be actually judged on, by this I mean about a paragraph and a half that has no real value to your match or your chances of winning. Matt Rydell, Adrian Flynn, and Chris Michaels had a really good promo length if you want to check out theirs on the Promo Scripts page…all were long enough to include everything I was looking for in a really good promo, they were long enough to feel satisfied after reading, they were just right. What I liked about their promos was that there was no excessive waste and they got straight into the reason for promoing/roleplaying in the first place: to win matches. A shorter style promo also frees up your time, gives you some structure, and if you are writing just for the sake of writing a  tonne of words then what does it really achieve at the end of the day?

We don’t expect hefty or huge essays, if I was to see a twenty page promo I might actually cry where I was sitting. Not because of the time I would waste, but because I know someone would have wasted their time constructing a promo which would quite frankly frustrate me and I would end up hating it. Super-long is very bad. If you are familiar with e-feds online currently, then you may know that there is a reputation for excessively long promos and at Infinity we think that is unnecessary as we don’t have strict expectations over the need to write ridiculously long submissions that dishearten people if they lose.

My advice would be to write a promo about 3-4 A4 pages long, when you get to writing it those pages will fill up in no time at all and you should feel confident that is enough to clinch a good result in your match. This template is short and long enough for the reader of your promo to feel satisfied and wanting more and not getting bored or frustrated. Alternatively 2-4 pages/entries/parts on the promo-scripts forum is roughly the same amount as 3-4 A4 pages.

Grammar Mistakes
It may not be the most important factor in the arsenal of promo judging but good grammar can go a long way to give good first impression, a well written piece can really make it easier for the judger to see that you took your time to seriously write your promo. One major pitfall of many people is not to use a spellcheck, some words if not corrected can have a whole new meaning and can actually a stop a really good read in its tracks. Just be careful people, it’s the little things that add up in a promo. Everyone had at least one grammar mistake so this is message to the entire roster for the future just to keep it classy.

Dirty Laundry – New Additions to the Infinity City website
Right peeps, before I move onto the match there is a quick announcement to be made: management is working to add a part to the website where you can view these things:
·         Promo Board: You’ll be able to view your current promo score and the performance and statistics of each Infinity show and PPV
·         Win-Loss Records: A basic rundown of individual win-loss-draw records, but only that…download the more comprehensive sheet and make your own record for your time in the Infinity City
·         Promo Compilation: After each show I am compiling all the promos that have been written, because promos are a part of the living story they are valuable and an excellent source of reference. The first one will be up ASAP!

Now, what you have all been waiting for. I will be discussing all seven matches that took place on Infinity #1. I hope you find this feedback useful for making improvements in the future. Please try to read all the match comments, being the King of Character I learnt by reading over peoples feedback and haunted my opponents strengths and weaknesses, maybe you can learn something too by reading everyone else’s feedback.

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Match One: Murray Muir vs. Matt Young
What a match to kick off Infinity #1 to, Murray Muir and Matt Young had a compelling match with two really good promos. Murray Muir won this match, and he moves onto the next stage of the world championship tournament. This match surprised me, as Matt Young’s prior reputation for promos had everyone assured of a Murray victory, that however was not the case. Management read Young’s, then Muir’s promo. After reading Matt Young’s promo I was asking myself if Damien had produced a great promo, because he would need it.

I will start with Matt Young’s promo as I read it first, and he had produced a well written promo with only a few grammar mistakes which I like to see. Young’s promo was a short and sweet read, and very enjoyable. The length of the promo was ok, but it could benefit from being a little bit longer to add some content that further elaborates the points he had made in his promo. Young does very well to state his case for winning the championship, why he is relevant compared to the rest of the Infinity roster, and why moving out of tag team wrestling and onto the next stage of his career is important, and it was nice to see it in his promo, having read his promos in UBW it is good to see he has advanced his writing skills. There were things though that could be done to improve what was already there, and things he could have done differently to make a good impact. One thing me and Robbo discussed was his breaking of the fourth wall, Matt…if you are reading you state in your promo that “but after reading your character profile” when addressing Murray Muir. We believe that this isn’t such a bad thing, but it could have been done differently, for example, “after I researched into Murray’s past” would be much better to use. Young has broken the fourth wall many times, as a kayfabe character this can be a sloppy technique, another case was when he referenced “Bebo wrestling” when he should have used the “Bebo Wrestling Network” instead to add some nice kayfabe in the mix of his promo, it may sound like I am picking holes but it took away from the focus of the character bubble by piercing through it to reference the ‘real world’. As long as Young pays attention to this matter his promos should read much better. Overall, Young had a direct and relevant submission, which kept to his alignment, displayed knowledge of the City to his advantage, but despite what I loved about his promo he would fall short this time round for a simpler reason. His first promo in Infinity was an introduction promo and lacked enough content to include everything I was looking for in a winning promo that Murray had achieved in his. There was nothing wrong with his promo, in fact it was a refreshing read, and got him into the Power Rankings as a result. My advice to Young would be to be more edgy, and infuse his promo with some good old fashion sizzle and spice to get to the next level that he desires to reach. There was no giant punch factor that every promo needs to have a reader remembering his promo. With a little bit more bite and content Matt Young could be the serious competitor contending for championships all year round.

Moving onto Muir’s promo there was little I could fault him on when I read it, he ticked all of the criteria I was looking for and made for a really thrilling promo as it got more into it. I could tell Muir was writing better as he went along, the latter parts were a much better quality. It was nicely broken up into readable sections with no massive blocks of texts and was a good length too which made me wanting more after I finished it. Like Young he states his case for winning the championship, and that his character is a novice looking to prove himself. I loved his character involvement and cast, which made it into a real story, but the one thing I loved about Muir’s promo was that he Uses profanity bizarrely well, beats the cliché and we read lots of promo’s where it is very cringe-worthy. This didn’t come off as cringe at all. Story was a rollercoaster ride, and very entertaining read. Even though there could be some improvements naturally, but there were many shocks and twists throughout the story, and it culminated in a really good finish and a really amazing finish to the promo that captivated my attention. Some of the mistakes to clean up on include:
-          Dialogue: Could make it more obvious who is talking, it is hard to follow when dialogue is used in places, like when the first speech used.
-          Grammar: Change all numbers such as‘50’ to ‘fifty’.
-          Many UBW PPV references
-          Thought Italics: When Muir is thinking in his head, it is easier for the reader to identity them when they are in italics.

Match Two: Chris Michaels vs. Adrian Flynn
This match had both judges pulling their hair out, we knew it was coming, but we read two fantastically written promos. Adrian Flynn won this match because of the finish to Chris Michaels promo, in which he had breached Adrian’s kayfabe character by having a story where he was sleeping with Jaden, which we learn after Flynn wakes up from his dream. We believed that if Chris did not include this, and instead included a piece where he woke up to his wife and family, realising he had everything Flynn didn’t…would have won him the match. Both of their promos were really good length, and included everything we were looking for in the criteria (which is why it won match of the week). Furthermore both promo’s had a very good style and were easy on the eyes to read.

Adrian Flynn used very good imagery used throughout, and absolutely no grammar mistakes.
There was a slow build up, but has lots of emphasis on the real issue at hand which kept it relevant and direct. Incorporates his creations in the City well (characters, locations, etc.).
And his dialogue is used well; he creates believable conversations and characters, a very grounded approach which gives Adrian authenticity. Mentions Bebo past, tournament, and Michaels being a big deal which was nice to read. Overall, it had a big fight feel…like boxing…what is important is one match at time; dilemmas of wrestling, injuries, families, responsibility, a realistic setting. Adrian doesn’t need to be out of this world. There is no mincing around with who he is. The highlight of this promo for me was the Alexis character, Adrian’s wife. Seeing a more desperate side to Adrian could really spice up his character, I know Kasey will be reading this so as the main point of critique on a character level I will say that when a hero is challenged with a moral dilemma or set of choices they’ll always cross paths with many dark moments and acts of desperation, a deeper inner conflict would make the Adrian character a very formidable man. The only other thing I would mention is that Adrian’s promo could do better with more reference to Chris, from the whole scouting out point of view.

Chris Michaels has a behind the scenes feel to his promo, this is stuff that wrestlers do together…there is a vivid scene about what is going on right now. Batman vs. Clark got the big match feel about it. Talks issues with the wrestlers injuries, his injuries, I could even recommend that Chris needed to say to Flynn that he was taking his life for granted. Bit about fans being selfish is really good…really deep character, on character he knows he is a work, and he doesn’t live up to his alter ego. The writer puts across Chris Michaels being a veteran very well, who can see through Flynn’s masquerade. Questions Adrian being a hero and he keeps Flynn in character for the most part, which is amazing to read.
Well written, Michaels personal dialogue is better than Flynn’s, however Flynn’s other character dialogue is better than Michaels other character dialogue. Dream bit of his promo was really good, but there was more reality of the situation in the dream than in the reality itself. From a reading point of view it is good, but also confusing, as he puts Flynn out of character…if on the other foot that was Chris waking next to his wife realising that he had everything Flynn didn’t have at the moment. Ending made it easier for us to make a decision that we before reading were going to struggle to make. Chris wrote a solid promo, and as already said only an improvement to the ending would have secured him victory.

Match Three: Jack Anderson vs. Taylor Westfall
There is not a lot to say about this match really, Jack Anderson failed to submit a promo which was disappointing, which left Taylor Westfall with the easy task of doing something, anything…to win the match.

But for the sake of commenting on what I read, I will be honest, I knew that this was a minute long botch promo…the writer even told us himself. It may have been enough to win Taylor the match, but because I don’t know the true extent of either of these people’s abilities my judgement on their character will be misleading. I am intrigued though what Taylor will do against Lucian Shannon on the next Infinity though. A word of warning though…Taylor’s promo was easily forgettable, short, had plenty of grammar mistakes, and if, just if Jack Anderson were to promo last second with a better piece of work then there is a no shadow of a doubt that this promo would have not been enough to see Taylor through to the next round.

Match Four: Lucian Shannon vs. Craig Anderson
The final match in the IWF World Championship tournament bracket for the first show and another close match to call, but it was ultimately Lucian Shannon was victorious in this bout between the two superstars. Close match…but Lucian shaded it. Both men had written good pieces, both need better understanding of their character which is what will drive their promo skills up and through the roof. It will come in time as we get into the running of shows more. Both wrestlers need just subtle improvements more than anything at this stage, things like fixing grammar and improving their dialogue. When I write anything I read it aloud, trust me it makes a world of difference in the long run as it allows you to read it how a story is told.

The winning promo from Lucian was an entertaining read and grabbed my attention; it did however lose momentum quickly in the middle, but picked it up again at the end. I loved his affixation on Craig’s wife Jess which really drove home some of Lucian’s intentions. Lucian hit most of the points on the promo criteria, including saying that he intends to win and what the world tournament meant to him which makes it relevant and direct to the match.
It was a very good introduction promo…gives a slither, short and sweet, gives a bit to go on, makes you want know more about him in a way which was written well with little grammatical error. He is the ultimate loner gimmick, and we expect him to feed us more. Overall, the promo complimented his character but there are steps to be taken to advance it further, who know at this point it is a thing or trial and error so we are here to help any character. There were some editorial things Lucian should stray from, for example:
I foretell I am going to do. And that is a) Command and b) Conquer. I will command this ring and I will conquer the IWF World Heavyweight Championship.”
This if written a different way and without the “a)” and “b)” would have really made this a easier read, but these are just the small things and ways to make incremental changes that really do go a long way to mastering promos.
Furthermore Lucian if he were to play off the angle nobody has confidence in his abilities, as he has not been voted once on either of the opinion polls could give him a good edge in his next promo. Everyone loves a good old fashioned and controversial comeback story.
Underground home wasn’t mentioned at all which was surprising, seeing as it is a unique aspect of the character. I would recommend Lucian incorporate his City involvement, very much like the advice I gave to Matt Young. One additional comment on the character side of things involves the whole ‘coming from the dark’ angle, Lucian needs a unique selling point, that extra flare and reason why his gimmick is distinguished from the all so many ‘dark & mysterious’ characters out there. I believe the gimmick will get better with age, and as he gets more acquainted with the City it will only get better. I have high hopes for Shannon if he promos every match he is in, and he must step up against Taylor Westfall for Infinity #2.

Craig Anderson’s promo was an ok read with a decent length and style, it didn’t need to be longer or it risked dragging out the same points he was making. We understand Craig had minimal to work with in regards to Lucian’s character, for future I recommend in these situations to stick to a person’s strengths in overcoming any odds and the unknown rather than make blind assumptions. Alternatively Craig could have focused on overcoming the unknown, rather than saying he has everything Lucian doesn’t. Craig’s character kept to his alignment and he also stated his case for winning the championship convincingly. There is a lot of potential with Craig, but in this instance we know, and felt, like he had rushed his promo to meet the deadline. If he took a step back and figured out where his character was heading, and how to get there he is going to be a strong force in the Infinity City.
One thing that this promo made me aware of is interpreting another person’s character, I don’t myself if Lucian Shannon is also the same kayfabe man as Bobby Hogan, but Craig made many references to Lucian as Bobby which I found confusing as I didn’t know quite who he was talking or directing his fight and efforts against. From the viewpoint of Lucian, he will be asking: why is he talking about this Bobby Hogan character? Lastly with a better involvement of the Infinity City will benefit his promos in the future, with some moderate changes and a considerate amount of time into his promos Craig Anderson will go the distance.



Match Five: Jamo vs. Kaos
In this match, there was a no-show from Typhon Kaos which meant that all that Jamo had to do was promo to win the match, which he did. Jamo now moves into his second submission match against Starkiss on the second Infinity on the route find out who will be the first IWF Singularis Champion.

What can I say about Jamo’s promo? It was clear the type of Jamo is immediately; he didn’t mince his words and cut to the chase which made it very direct and relevant. A bad-ass who knows exactly how he is going to dismantle his opponents, it was a short, brief, but very entertaining piece which made me laugh in some parts. This shoot-style promo was a refreshing read admittedly, and did win him the match. As Jamo continues his path of destruction in Infinity then he will need to brush up on a few things, such as adding some more content to each promo submission, fixing the many grammar mistakes within, and incorporating more City fiction such as places and people. If he was to do these things for his match against Starkiss I am sure the Grimm Reaper will have no problem competing effectively and putting his name around some future gold.

Match Six: Charismatic vs. Holmes
This was the third match in Infinity #1 where only one of the contestants did a promo which was a great shame as I was really interested in seeing what Blair Holmes and John Charismatic would do against one another, despite them being in the same team. John Charismatic won after Blair Holmes did not submit a promo. Hopefully both can show up and put up a strong offense against Casanova & Jameson on the next show.

Charismatic’s promo was a very interesting and entertaining read, it has been quite a long time since I had read any of his work and it is safe to say the structure and style of his writing has dramatically improved! Dialogue is used very well and convincingly, it is direct and relevant, keeps to his face alignment, and supports his character which does not contradict him. Overall, a very well rounded promo. What I loved about it was the story, about the tragedy of his wife and it was a good twist and fun to read, also Charismatic hits the nail on the head about real wrestler issues such as financial hardship which was really compelling. Additionally his addition of the Charismatic Coliseum really sold him in his promo.  I even get a special mention in his promo which was good as he got my character spot on, he could see through his mentor and the plan he had devised…it also did well to give him a veteran feel. I wanted to read more of his promo, especially as it included the point of Harmony in the tag division. Having said all that his future promos could really benefit with additional length and content to really push up the quality…still, is he even over? Probably not. But hey, what would I know about the man I trained?

Match Seven: Casanova vs. Rydell vs. Jameson
The main event was a tough call, mostly because we had to consider if any of three promos was good enough to win the first championship in IWF, the Purity shield. Robbo made it clear to me when judging the match about a concept he use to use in UBW when judging promos for FnF. He asked me what did I want to read more of? If there was three taster books I had just sampled and I could only buy one, which would it be?
When it comes down to it due to the similar styles of promo it comes down to the question: Who made the best case for the championship. Rydell was the one who gave us more substance…Rydell gave us the full sandwich; there was more ingredients in his promo for me to feel happy we’d made the right choice. Jameson had given us the sweet bacon, but no real sustenance to feel content with the decision. Casanova would have won if he made reference to why the Purity belt meant to him…about shaping the Purity belt in the Fair City way.
Final match made me want to read more of their promos and they were all really imaginative, it was a really good main event that should be benchmarked for the coming years.

Casanova’s was a really enjoyable read and accessible on a really cool format, having an individual blog made it so much more personal for him which sold him really well. He keeps to his character and has lots of reference to the Infinity City fiction which is really nice to see mentioned. Speaking of mentions, he was the only superstar to mention our TV-14 rating and the BZN network. As I already stated Casanova fell short because of his lack of incorporation of the Purity Championship being the focus which is why Rydell got the edge in the match.
Also, I wanted to read more and more of Fair City’s hooligan, the promo itself was a tad shorter than I expected and could have really benefited with some additional length to discuss why he the Purity championship deserves to be in the hands of someone not in the City.

The match winner Matt Rydell’s promo was the most direct and relevant to the Purity Championship, as well as being written well, in character, interesting to read, and complimenting to everything Matt Rydell stands for. He had a perfectly balanced promo in terms of length and additions, filling every criterion we look for in a championship winning promo. He could have improved his promo with more reference to the City that the other two had made in their submissions but the strength of his promo was so good it didn’t matter this time round as it was a really good read. Congratulations to the first Purity champion, let’s hope for more of the same for your defense next week against the Blood Family’s Neal Powers.

Jameson was so close to winning, which is why the decision was a debate between management over who and why the winner should walk away with the belt. Jameson’s submission really sold me on his character and instantly grabbed my attention, what I love most about it is the style of the promo it is written in, you know when you are reading a Jameson/Harding promo. The promo had some relevance to the match, but very shoot-based, written well and enlightening to the points he was making, such as the role of media and television in questioning what is normal and mainstream. In stating that Purity is something away from the ordinary was something I didn’t expect and enjoyed reading about. I wanted to read more of it, and I wish it was longer, as I said Jameson had everything sweet I was looking for but not enough to clinch a full victory. Having said that I commend his promo, and all of the competitors in this match…good luck to both Casanova and Jameson in their upcoming match against Team Over Rated on Infinity #2.

TCK’s Promo of the Week
I am proud to announce that promo of Infinity #1 goes to…Adrian Flynn!


He has shown promise in the first outing of Infinity; his promo was compelling and really gave a grounded, realistic character that is full of challenging dilemmas in his life whilst incorporating aspects of the Infinity City fiction. His promo put him through to the semi-finals of the IWF World Championship tournament against Murray Muir, and with an expectation of tough competition from Damien Muir’s nephew it will only get tougher in the next round. Can Adrian Flynn keep this top spot for next week? Who knows, but based off the beautiful promo he constructed for the first week of Infinity we may already be looking at the new champion.  

Feedback Me More?
Excuse the awful Ryback pun, but in all seriousness if you wish to discuss more about your individual promos or anything else related to anything like your character or promos do not hesitate to contact Infinity Management. We’ll always respond to emails, or if you have either of the 2.0 Initiative on Facebook send us a private message or post in the Infinity group and I’m sure a conversation will break out.

TCK’s Email: infinitycopycat@gmail.com
Infinity Email: wrestlinginfinity@gmail.com


  

No way is better than the imitative way.
Copy That!

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@TheCopycatKid
@infinityIWF
www.infinitywrestling.net

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